Horrible Bosses!

There's a common saying in the corporate world, "people don't leave companies, they leave bosses". Why is it that this particular breed is the same? how can it be? all humans are different, every one has a unique DNA, different fingerprints even, yet when someone graduates to becoming that dreaded being called a "BOSS", everyone becomes exactly the same, how?

My first prolonged and proper interaction with this ajeeb aur ghareeb kaum was when I started to work at  a multinational back in April 2003. I had gone through a couple of internships and a couple of one month stints before landing up there, but this is when I really found out what a "BOSS"can be like.
My first day, and I found out that I was to have a female boss, I had heard even weirder stuff about this gender of the species, and when I finally got to my desk she was waiting. She seemed pleasant enough, didn't have any devilish horns, or a spike tail, and if I remember correctly actually smiled. She handed me my project list straight away and so began our journey, one never to be forgotten by me and one that I would profit from remarkably.

When you're at this MNC, you have to understand that even the receptionist and the tea boy are challenged to be their best day in, day out. Even they have to follow the "success drivers" and play their part in being a member of the High Performing Organization (HPO). So the fact that this trickles down (or up, depending on how you look at it) to the ABMs really isn't a surprise. We were a bright bunch if I do say so myself, fresh out of university with dreams in our eyes of being successful (however each one of us defined it) but all of us were violently brought down to earth by our respective bosses. In those first days, every bit of self confidence was ground out of us to the point that you thought whether you were good enough at all, whether you even had it in you to be successful. Terms like "batti sessions"and "äaloo aagaya" were commonplace. Whenever you saw an ABM with his/her boss in a huddle room, the prevailing rumour would be of a batti session in progress under the guise of a "öne to one".

In my time there, I had been taken to the cleaners on numerous occasions. I often wondered how important was that comma or full stop that I had to be called back from half way home and complete the document. That I was kept in office till 2 AM in order to prepare for a meeting the next day. That I was given a dressing down for the promoters not knowing my name which meant that I wasn't involved in the project enough, and the funniest of all, being asked to go through a piece of A4 sized paper without tearing or cutting it, oh and in the same session I was also asked to stand on top of the table, I forget why though. These plus other numerous altercations mainly around me wanting to go home quickly, and my boss wanting  me to put in more hours, led to the embedding of continuous resentment against her and developing a victim mentality.

After 3 long years, I had had enough and decided that this life wasn't for me. Its not that I didn't want to work hard, but I didn't want to be consumed by my job. For me the job was going to be the means to an end which was a more fulfilled life after work, however, I may chose to spend it. I took the first job that came my way and made the first mistake of my career. Anyways, the stars were smiling on me and I quickly got out of that predicament and landed a job at my current place of employment, another MNC, where I've been now for the past 5 and a half years.

The start here wasn't very rosy as well. Here, I walked into another Pakistani belonging to the old school of autocratic management, believing in might is right and really maintaining a control on every little thing I did. Once again I found my wings being clipped and the style being cramped. Since this was a start up in this region, the office was very small, not more than a big room which at its full capacity seated 5 people. In this environment all phone calls were overheard and promptly disturbed, every meeting was followed up on with detailed feedback and minutes being sought even on weekends. Eventually, I was reduced to being a paper pusher with a fancy title and responsibility portfolio, my creativity was being blunted and initiative had been beaten out of me completely. I had become what I had tried to avoid all along, a work horse. I hated going to office everyday, and each day took special will power, prayers and my personal predicament back home to get me through it. One and a half years of this and I had reached a nervous break down. Once this man was rotated and left the scene, the others and myself were left completely drained, both emotionally and physically, totally devoid of any energy to get anything done. I spent the next 3 months doing nothing, just getting by and god bless the man who replaced my first boss, as he not only put up with me at this time but actually took measures to correct the situation. If it wasn't for him, my faith in such a thing as a good Boss would've been lost forever.

Every breed has an odd one out, every family has a black sheep and so in walked the black sheep of bosses. This person bucked the trend and changed the whole mindset. His approach to being a boss was so different and refreshing that finally we found the room to breathe again. slowly but surely, the positive attitude, the constant encouragement and the completely collaborative style got me up and running again. I enjoyed the 2 most fruitful years of my professional career and quickly went up the ladder from a SBM to heading the marketing department. Since then the first guy has come back and he's been my boss now again for almost 2 years. I still remember when I found out that he was coming back, I had palpitations and tried to do everything in my power to jump ship. For some reason that wasn't to be my escape and I stayed on. In the beginning there was ample evidence that the same old ways were to be employed and it didn't matter what I had become or developed into, for him, I was going to be the same old boy he could bark at and get his work done.

Things have turned out differently, both of us are still here, I have found my voice, he has changed some, due to feedback from me and others like me and we're surviving. I was thrown a line atleast on a couple of occasions to ply my trade elsewhere, but both times I turned it down and stuck at it. Having spent more than 8 years working under different bosses, I can safely say that I have learnt from all of them and that I wouldn't have it any differently than it was since each and every experience has shaped me and made me what I am today. Having a team of 8 now of my own, I would also like to think that I handle my team completely differently and actually apply my belief that keeping a happy and congenial atmosphere actually gets more work done rather than keeping a tense atmosphere. That people should be motivated by an inner desire to do their best and an aspiration to be the best rather than being beaten into submission. Let them fly, let them make mistakes so that they learn from them, don't hold them back and most importantly smile while going about it. The only qualifier is that everyone is sincere and is willing to learn, once those qualities are confirmed, there's no limit to the fun everyone can have.

So here's to all the bosses I've worked with, thank you for all the time you put in with me, however misguided, I have definitely learnt a lot from all of you, whether its what to do or what not to do, but my advice to the first 2 in my career would be to still take it easy, take a deep breath and slow down. Take stock of your lives and really decide whether this is the most important thing in your lives, that this is the legacy you want to leave behind. This is how you want to be remembered? I'm sure the answers to all those questions will be a resounding "no", so then why do it? why behave in this manner? Just so that you can get that next pay raise or that next promotion, and then what? I am a big believer in everyone getting what has already been set for them by Allah. Yes we need to work hard for that and be sincere in what we do, but we don't need to turn into monsters. Just think about it!

Later,
Shaku

P.S. I expect my team to post only positive comments about me should they read this :-)